The Secret

K so.

I've been sitting here rereading the previous post and I thought I would clarify the part about deciding to be a musician.

I am a person who trusts their instincts, but I like to analyze a situation before going through with a descision. My head and my heart are always clashing. Always, which is another reason I'm getting so stressed out this year. Since I'm graduating, I feel as though I need to know what I'm going to do with my life.

You've heard this all before, right?

Yeah, then I go to the school counsellors and they all tell me the same thing, apply for scholarships even though you might now use them, chose the right classes, keep your grades high blablablaalbalab FUCK.
I don't CARE about my average. Let me explain.

In grade 10, I had a very clear vision of the future. I'd go to "performing arts college" and then become an "actress or something". Welll said, grade 10 Victo, well said. Well thought through. So then the realities of that little plan started beckoning my subcouncious. "You're never going to become an actress! How can you even THINK that!? You're just like every other wannabe out there!! You need a "SAFE JOB".. What about your kids? Are you going to have kids? Do you want them to be skeletor kids? Starving SKELETOR KIDS!?"

My subcouncious is a very darling character.

So then at the end of last year in grade 11, I decided that I was going to go to the University of Waterloo to become a biologist.

What?
You heard me, I want to do science.
But you hate math..
SHUT UP. Let me figure out my LIFE.

So then all during the summer I was thinking about it and trying to desperatley make up for lost time, having not done any science classes in grade 11 that I needed except for Biology, which for SOME REASON, God threw me the curveball of being really really good at Biology, like WTF. So then I had a little revelation and decided that No, I do want to do music, but I want to do the business side of things, like a promoter or something. Maybe I'll just go to a college and learn business.

And I was so so so sure. Then, my dad, that amazing man, sat me down one night and the conversation went like this:

So, you don't want to do this, do you?
Do what?
Go to college.
Uhh, yeah I do.
No, Victoria, you don't.
What are you talking about? Of course I do.
No. You don't.
Yeah, daddy, I do.
Victoria. You look me in the eyes and tell me that you want to go to Durham College to study business.
I want to go to Durham College to study business.
No you don't.
..Yes I do.
No you don't.
Um, yeahh. Yes I do yes I do..
Victoria.


And then I started crying. So hard. So long. I was convulsing with emotion. Paralyzed. It was one of the strangest things I've ever gone through. After about two hours of that, just being a pathetic miserable lump on my bed, everything was suddenly very clear:

I was to become a musician. And not just any musician. A very very well known dance music producer. The reason that that desicion was so hard to take is that, there is no obvious route to get there. When you want to become a doctor, yes it's extremely difficult, but the way to do it is extremely obvious. Music isn't a walk in the park to be successful at since so much of it is chance. I believe strongly in The Secret, or the Law of Attraction. http://www.thesecret.tv/

Ever since my decision of having that as my main goal, everything that I do, breathe, say and dream about is planned so that it's leading me to that goal. Everything. You guys, it works. It's been a month and I've started a project, I'm meeting people who come to ME, people want to collaborate, I'm getting song ideas, I'm getting gigs, I found a rapper.. on and on and on..

You have to live as if it's already happened. I live as though I'm a pop star, but the world just doesn't know it yet. And it's working. I have to just laugh it off when people doubt me, which is especially hard when it's your family or close friends.

I hope that gave some insight. If you read this, let The Secret into your lives.. it's seriously an amazing tool.

One love.
Victo